Fs revisited

Over Thanksgiving Uncle Phil reminded us of his five Thanksgiving Fs. They are: food, family, friends, fun, and football.

This week I got to experience 5 more Fs: family, fun, food, faith, and farewells.

My grandma Ruth passed away Friday, December 17 following a battle with cancer. I was wishy-washy about flying out to Utah, taking time off right before Christmas, making sub plans, leaving Annabelle, etc. I am so thankful that many people around me encouraged me to go. My friend Deb expressed to me how important it will be for her to have her children around her when her mother eventually passes away. I didn't think that I needed to go for me, but I knew I needed to go for my mom. The whole purpose of life is family and I needed to take this time to be with my extended family and to see Grandma in all of us.

Now, it might seems strange to some that I included fun in my Fs of my trip out for my grandmother's funeral, but it was fun. Grandma would have wanted us to have some fun. It was fun to remember Grandma. It was fun to be with all my cousins, siblings, aunts and uncles, niece and nephew. It was fun to be at Grandma's house all together, even though it was hard not to have Grandma Ruth there. It is impossible to get our whole family together and not have some fun.

As with any Bryan family function, the food was so good. Marie, Anna, and others kept yummy food and drinks coming. Grandma's ward made a delicious funeral luncheon that included everything except enough of Grandma's rolls.

More than anything this was a faith building trip. Faith that I will see my grandmother again, faith that our family is eternal because of our temple covenants, faith that she is spending time right now with Grandpa and her baby Kathleen, faith that it is possible to live in the world and not be of the world, faith that I have part of my grandma in me and that I might someday be at least a fraction of the amazing person she is, and especially, faith that Christ made eternal families possible.

Lastly, it was a second farewell to my angel grandmother who lived her life serving others.

On my flight out to Utah I kept thinking of a song about a grandmother, "Ella Mae" by Greg Brown. Here are some particularly applicable lyrics.

"Ella Mae - all the gifts you gave
Tremble in my life like a startled deer
You gave me my Pa
Who is in me as you are
And the southern piney hills
The clear water and the running rills
That tumbled through the lives of us all.

Six big men and one big strong woman
You and little Granpa David raised up there
They all had families
We all come back to see you
You hugged us all in turn
Cocked you head and said we'd grown
And touched us with your hands
That smelled like bread

Ella Mae - I can see you plain as day
Sailing out like a ship to your garden
In your old wide-brim straw hat
With a long handled hoe in your hand.
pausing at the gate I see you look south to the pond
A long time quiet smile on your face.

Ella Mae - the redwings left today
Passing in a long cloud of wings
They're headed down your way
They'll be there in a couple of days
They'll sing that song you loved
As they fly above
Your resting place by David in the pines."

I miss her but she gave me my mom, who is in me like I hope Grandma is in me.